The XYZ Files  
 

Henry's Cat had prepared himself a beautiful meal as a reward for doing something clever. He hadn't actually done anything clever, but he felt that one day he would, and when he did he would have a reward. This was a practice meal so he would be ready when he really did something clever. The meal was sausages fried in marzipan covered in tomato ketchup with chocolate flavouring and sprinkled with coconut icing and vinegar. It was delicious, even better than bacon flavoured crisps in custard.

He turned on the TV and watched the National Welly Boot Throwing Championships, then a programme about growing rhubarb, and finally, the programme he had been waiting for, The XYZ Files.

It was all about how aliens come to earth and do naughty things like changing the clocks so everyone gets up when they should be going to bed. Sometimes they make it rain when the weatherman has said it is going to be sunny.

They even changed the days of the week round once so everyone thought it was Tuesday when it was Friday. That was very annoying. The Prime Minister said that aliens were not allowed to come to earth any more unless they apologised. But as they didn't, a Special Agent was sent out with his friend to stop them. It was very exciting. The aliens looked like ordinary people except that they had their ears backwards. This is how the Special Agents could tell.

Because their ears were backwards they could not wear sunglasses without them falling off, so whenever the Special Agents found a pair of sunglasses on the ground they knew that an alien was around. Henry's Cat though that he would like to be a Special Agent catching aliens. As he was thinking about it he slowly drifted off to sleep.

The phone rang. Henry's Cat, Special Agent jumped out of his bullet proof bed and stuffed his bullet proof hot water bottle up his nightshirt as protection as he crept slowly down to the phone. He picked up cautiously.

"I'm not in" he said, and put the phone down. It rang again. This time he picked it up and said, "wrong number."

The third time it rang he knew it was from the Prime minister as this was their secret code.

The Prime Minister spoke very seriously.

"Hallo Henry's Cat, this is the Prime Minister speaking. We have had a very bad attack of aliens again. They have turned the traffic lights upside down, put a cuckoo clock in Big Ben, and turned all the signposts the wrong way round. No one knows where they are going, what the time is, or when to stop at traffic lights. You've got to do something about it. I find it all very upsetting and it's giving me indigestion."

This really was serious. It was one thing for aliens to put cuckoo clocks in Big Ben, but giving the Prime Minister indigestion was going too far. Henry's Cat put on his false backward ears to disguise himself as an alien then went out to do some shopping. All the traffic was going the wrong way and not stopping at the lights. Henry's Cat got out his binoculars and looked around. It was not long before he could see several people giggling. He suspected they were aliens. He walked over to them and tried to look at their ears, but they were covered up.

He thought he would accidentally try to knock their hats off so he could see their ears, but being a rather small cat he could not reach their ears very well. He had a better idea. He would follow them home and then try and sneak in to their house and examine everything. He waited and waited. In fact he waited so long that he fell asleep. It wasn't until the street cleaner came along and shook him that he realised it was four o'clock in the morning. The aliens had gone home and he had missed them.

 
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